Women's Work

I owe it to my mom

My interest in theatre, specifically musical theatre, is something I attribute completely to my mother. I may not have seen The Godfather until I was almost 30, but I'd seen every movie musical at least twice and could sing along with most of them. It's funny how everything you watch or listen to as a kid is completely a reflection of your parents' tastes. I know there are holes in my cinematic and musical educations and I am working to fill those. But I'm not complaining. I love that I was shown musical from a young age and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

Not too long ago I told my mother than I was going to watch 1776 on July 4th like we always did when we were kids and thanked her for getting me starting on my love of musicals. Her response was something about how she used the musicals to teach us history. Um, huh? I can see how that would work for 1776 and maybe for Oklahoma, but for a lot of the rest it was just an odd thing to say. But regardless of the reason she did it, the love is there.  This is also the same woman who is the reason I didn't really listen to The Beatles when I was a kid. I knew who they were and a few of their songs but I really didn't know a lot. I asked her about this at one point, and her answer made a lot of sense. She said at the time their older stuff was just not available and that she didn't really care for the newer stuff that was available. So we listened to The Beach Boys and Creedence Clearwater.And I still have a big gap where The Beatles are concerned :) For better or for worse, my mother's taste really did shape who I am today.

I'm lucky to live in a large metropolitan area where I have ready access to lots of theatre. There are several venues that book touring shows from Broadway, lots of regional companies, and about a million little tiny theatres. I used to go all the time, and while that has tapered off some, I do still go when I have the chance. Last week I saw Oklahoma (I thought it was a fitting Halloween choice) and Spring Awakening. I saw the latter at a weekday matinee and it was amusing to hear all the outraged gasps at the simulated sex and slight nudity. I guess this one is a little more cutting edge than their usual shows. But I loved it. Now I want to go out and buy the cast recording.

My mother also fostered my love of books and reading. She used to sit in the hall and read to us at night, usually books far beyond even my older sister's reading level. Before the age of ten I'd gone through Roots, Gone with the Wind, and Costain's Plantagenet chronicles in this way. It was a great family bonding experience and a wonderful exposure to the world of books.

One of the other things that a large city enjoys is book singings and author tours. I wish there was a better way to find out about such things so that I didn't miss anyone good. In the past few years I've seen Meg Cabot, Richard Belzer, John Green, Neil Gaiman, and many others read and discuss their books. I have my little fan girl moment when I meet them and I get a nice autograph and usually a picture. These moments make my heart happy. There is also the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books every April which is just a fantastic event with hundreds of discussions and readings. I've only missed one year since it started, and that was just rotten timing. I was out of town following my musical obsession of the moment, The Scarlet Pimpernel. It was being performed by a high school up near Napa so a friend and I decided to do a weekend in the wine country and see the show. It was only a little weird to go to a high school production when we didn't know anyone in the cast, right?

Living in a large area with access to so many great things doesn't mean I always take advantage of all the things going on around me, but I'm ok with that. I can go months without going to a play or a museum or even going to the movies, but then I start to miss these things and I have a really plate full little while. The past six weeks or so has been one of those busy times for me. I've been to several plays,  several movies, a handful of suthor tours, and I even spent a weekend in Las Vegas. Vegas is a crazy place and has a culture all its own. I love going to visit, but I know if I lived there I'd stay far far away from the strip.

My favorite way to see a movie is at a screening with a Q&A afterwards. I get invitations to a screening series run my a screenwriting magazine and after nearly every show there is a Q&A. Usually it's the screenwriter, but I've also seen actors and directors discussing their films. I love all this behind the scenes stuff and I was sad that the series seemed to be dead over the summer months. And it definitely helps that these screenings are usually free.

I also tend to stay far away from the more touristy areas in my own city because I don't like crowds. Yes I live in a large metropolitan area, and yes I hate crowds. I wonder sometimes if I've turned into the disapproving old lady rather than the yip young thing I like to see myself as. :) I want people to STFU during a movie or a play and I don't care to hear your end of a cell phone conversation. But I put up with these things for the sake of the stuff I do love. At least for now.

Childhood Memories

When I left my mother's house, I took exactly one recipe with me, for her enchiladas. Several years before I left, my mom just stopped cooking. The task fell to whichever kid happened to be around and all the foods I loved as a kid were no longer made. Instead we had stuff that was quick and easy to cook, like spaghetti with store bought sauce and Top Ramon. Oddly enough, I despise Top Ramen but still love spaghetti. Once I had a part time job and was making my own money, I hardly ever ate at home. I missed the meals I'd loved as a kid and it made me sad to be at home.

Since I left, my mother's cooking just doesn't taste the same. When she cooks now, it's not at all what I remember, and sadly, I don't care for it. It breaks my heart  to say it, but it's the truth. I know my tastes have changed but I didn't realize that they'd changed so much until I had that first meal back at home. I started to wonder if it was me or if her cooking had gone downhill. And that's a question I don't thin I'll ever have an answer for. Holidays when I was a kid were full of love and good food, and my mom's stuffing was the best part. I wish I had the recipe from my childhood, because what she makes now is soggy and just not at all what I remember loving.

If I didn't like my mom's cooking, what did I like? I really wasn't sure, so I started to try lots of different types of foods and over the years I figured out what made me happy. I found out that I loved spicy foods (another change form my childhood) and that I liked garlic. I knew that I hated alfalfa sprouts and didn't much care for raw broccoli or raw celery, though I will eat both if they are cooked. So how did I go from knowing what I liked to eat to knowing what I was able to cook? After years of convenience meals and lots of eating out I decided that I wanted to learn to cook. There was lots of trial and error and plenty of mediocre meals along the way. The first thing that I learned to cook well was onion soup. I roughly followed this recipe from Vegetarian Times, tweaking it along the way until I was completely happy with it.

Then I got a little more ambitious. Chicken Piccata was something that I loved to order when I went out and I figured it couldn't be that hard to make. So I found a recipe that looked simple enough for a novice cook and started to experiment. This is what I finally settled on and I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. I liked to serve it over couscous or pasta and I sometimes go crazy with the lemon juice because I love the flavor it gives.

Chicken Piccata

Serves 4

Ingredients:

1/4 tsp black pepper
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 cup capers, drained
2 tsp olive oil
3 Tbsp butter at room temperature
1/2 medium lemon
1/3 cup lemon juice
1/4 cup parsley
2 uncooked chicken breasts, cut in half
1/2 cup chicken broth
1/3 cup white wine
2 1/2 Tbsp flour

Place chicken breasts between two large sheets of plastic wrap and lightly pound to 1/4 inch thickness.

Mix 1 Tbsp butter and 1 1/2 Tbsp flour in a small bowl until smooth. Set aside.

Place additional Tbsp flour, salty, and pepper in a shallow baking dish. Dip chicken in mixture to coat, shake off excess.

Heat olive oil in a heavy pan. Add chicken breast halves and cook until golden and cooked through, about 3 minutes a side. Transfer chicken to a plate and tent with foil to keep warm.

Bring Wine, lemon juice, and broth to a boil in the same pan over medium-high heat.

Whisk in the butter-flour mixture and boil until the sauce thickens slightly, about 2 minutes. Stir in the capers, parsley, and remaining 2 Tbsp butter. Season sauce to taste with salt and pepper.

Slice lemon for garnish. Pour sauce over chicken, top with the lemon garnish and serve.

My Mom's Enchiladas

Serves 6

Ingredients:

1 lb ground beef
1 large onion, diced
1 bunch green onions, chopped
16 oz. container of cottage cheese
a medium can of olive slices, cut further in the can
a large can of tomato sauce
a large can of enchilada sauce
a block of cheddar cheese, grated
12 flour tortillas, medium size

In a large bowl combine the tomato and enchilada sauces.

Cook the onion in olive oil until tender. Remove from pan and brown the ground beef, return the onion to the pan and combine.

Dip both sides of a tortilla in the sauce mixture and lay on a flat surface. Place a small amount each of the ground beef mixture, the green onions, the cottage cheese, the olives, and the grated cheese down the center of the tortilla. Roll up and place in a casserole dish. Repeat until all the tortillas have been used, squishing the enchiladas together as needed to make them all fit.

Pour the remaining sauce mixture over the finished enchiladas. Sprinkle the remaining grated cheese over the enchiladas as well.

Bake at 350 degrees for about 45 minutes covered with foil. Remove foil and continue to bake about 5 minutes or until the cheese is bubbling.

It's been years since I made these enchiladas, and if I made them today I would definitely make a few changes to lighten the recipe up. I'd use extra lean ground beef (4%), Cabot 75% reduced fat cheddar cheese, fat free cottage cheese, hot enchilada sauce, and probably corn tortillas.

My perspective on healthy eating has also changed a lot since I left home. Then I didn't even think about it, I just ate what I wanted. Now I look at a recipe and I think about how I can lighten it up. So maybe the other foods I loved as a child, beef stroganoff and Yorkshire Pudding should stay wonderful memories :)

It's Complicated

My life has been one long love-hate relationship with food. I love how food tastes but I hate that too much of it or the wrong kinds make me gain weight. I've finally realized that I need to treat food as fuel. Period. Food is not going to help me get over a broken heart, prop me up when I'm lonely, or soothe my hurt feelings. I still love how food tastes but I no longer let that love of taste take over my rational side. The love-hate relationship has also led to lots of yo-yo-ing in my weight. Food for me is very closely tied to weight and health. My love of food has definitely taken a back seat recently to my efforts to lose weight and get healthy.

Man do I love food. I love to eat it, cook it, shop for it, read about it, look at pictures of it, and smell it. If I had to choose one favorite food, cheese would win hands down. There are so many different types of cheese that I could eat a different one every day of the year. My current favorite in Cypress Grove's Humboldt Fog, which is a soft goat cheese with a vegetable ash running through it. Spread it on a nice baguette slice and it's just about perfect. When I was a child, I probably wouldn't have gone anywhere near a goat cheese. I was a funny kid with very bland taste buds. I hated anything spicy and didn't even like black pepper on my mac and cheese. And I hated clams.

As I've grown older by tastes have grown and changed as well. I don't remember when I had sushi for the first time, but I know I fell in love with it. I've also been won over to the awesomeness that is clams (and oysters and mussels). I also LOVE spicy foods, the spicier the better. I even order my Bloody Mary's extra spicy. I love trying new foods and finding new things that make my mouth and my healthier side happy. I completely remember the first time I had soba noodles, and now I eat them whenever I can. I had a roommate in college who took me to her favorite Vietnamese restaurant, order me a gigantic bowl of pho and then gave me a hard time when I wasn't able to finish it. This from a girl who was a toothpick but ate almost twice as much as I did on a regular basis. I'm sure that there are plenty more culinary experience out there for me to have and I'm looking forward to each and every one of them, even the ones that are spectacular disasters.

I really love going out to eat, but I also love to cook. It's almost like a game for me, taking things and transforming them into something completely different and delicious. And I like to think that I'm a decent cook. I have a few things that I do really well and many things that I do decently. What I really would love is that innate knowledge some people have for just knowing what will taste good together. When I first started I was a nervous cook and would follow a recipe to the letter. Thankfully I've moved past that state and can know throw in a bit of this and a bit of that and come out with edible meals. Every once in a while something will be bland, but it's been years since I made something that I took a few bites of and then threw out. I've really amazed myself recently with the use of blenders in making soups. I was scared of blended soups for a long time, and I have no idea why. But these days a nice potato leek is on my regular recipe rotation.

Food Porn is a big part of my life. I love looking at pictures of food, going through recipes, and even reading food memoirs. Ruth Reichl has several memoirs based around food that I really enjoyed, especially Garlic and Sapphires, which details the disguises she used as a food critic for The New York Times. Tom Sietsema of The Washington Post is also a favorite. He hosts a weekly live chat that I find greatly entertaining, despite living nowhere near Washington and being completely unfamiliar with the restaurants he reviews. Taking pictures of food before it's eaten has become such a big thing that several establishments in New York have banned the practice. That's really a shame I think.

Comfort foods are something I know everyone can relate too. As I mentioned before, cheese is my absolute favorite food. A grilled had and cheese sandwich is one of my favorite meals. But I've found a way to adapt it to my healthier eating habits. I use Cabot's 75% reduced fat cheddar (which melts like full fat cheese), a low calorie whole wheat pita for the bread, and Canadian Bacon for the ham. And I make it on a grill pan so no butter or oil is needed. It makes me very happy that I've found a way to make this favorite a little lighter. I've tried to lighten up other things with varying degrees of success. Cupcakes are a good one. Instead of the water, eggs, oil, or whatever else the mix calls for, I just use 12 ounces of diet soda. When the cupcakes bake I can't tell the difference and I've not added and fat or calories to what's in the mix. That is, of course, if I don't frost them. But what fun is that?

Food for me can be a very social endeavor. When I get together with my friends, food is usually involved. We go out to dinner, someone is hosting a dinner party or a sporting event party, and sometimes we spend hours tailgating before a football game. Yeah, food is most definitely a part of my social life, as is alcohol. I do wonderfully making healthy choices when I'm at home and cooking but I'm still working on making healthy choices when I'm in a social situation, especially one when where alcohol is involved. I get a few drinks in me and then I forget all that my rational side knows about proper portion sizes and ceasing to eat when I'm no longer hungry. It's something that I will probably be working on for the rest of my life.

Food is such a complex being: it's fuel, it's comfort, it's social, and it's fun. The food itself isn't anything but fuel. Everything else is what I associate with food and what I will work the rest of my life to control and conquer.

Learning to listen to my body

I'm not even sure how to start this. I've always thought of myself as a relatively healthy person. Sure I went to the emergency room a few times as a kid, but who didn't? I've always trusted my body, and my mind, to be there when I need them and to work flawlessly. It's a strange feeling of helplessness when your mind and body can no longer do what you've so long taken for granted.

The first time this happened, or maybe just the first time I remember it, was just after I went off to college. I was depressed, feeling abandoned by my family and just didn't know where to turn. Adjusting to college was hard enough without this added pressure. Therapy was a life saver, just having someone to talk to, someone who was on my side and wouldn't judge me, was a new and wonderful experience. I felt safe in that room, safe to cry my eyes out when I needed to, safe to say things that I was ashamed to admit to anyone, and safe to realize that the abandonment was not something I deserved. Since that time, my mind has been good to me. Like anyone, I have my ups and downs, but thankfully more of the up variety.

My body has probably been better to me than I deserve with all the abuse I've heaped on it through my yo-yoing weight, cigarette smoking, and lack of exercise. When it's good it's very very good, but when it's bad, I'm in trouble. My body has carried me through three marathons, several half marathons, and a host of other distance events. It's good to me when I'm good to it, but sometimes I think we have communication problems.

I've struggled with my weight most of my life, and would love for that to be a thing of the past. I've managed to drop a bunch of weight several times but then it all comes back. I'm about half way to my goal, achieved through both diet and exercise, and this time it's for keeps. I just can't to this to my poor body again. It stops here.

When I was at my heaviest my body was trying to tell me how unhappy it was, but I wasn't really listening, I wasn't ready to listen. I had terrible lower back pains, aching knees, and ankles that turned at the drop of a hat, even occasionally spraining one to make an even louder point. I know my body was telling me that I was asking too much of it, but my mind wasn't ready to listen. Instead of dropping the weight I was seeing a chiropractor and getting physical therapy to strengthen my back. When I finally realized that I was being awfully unfair to my body and decided to do something about it by eating better, exercising, and losing weight, all the problems magically cleared up. I can now stand at the sink and do dishes without my back screaming at me, I can cross my legs without my knees protesting, and I can wear my three and four inch heels again without fear of falling on my head from a twisted ankle (well mostly). I'm glad my body seems to have forgiven me the abuse I doled out and is behaving again. Though I won't mention my left knee which seems to hate me today.

Every so often the tendonitis in my wrists will start bothering me again, and sometimes I'll get a cold, but I'm still a pretty healthy person. I just need to take care of the body and mind I was given and work with them to keep me running like a well oiled machine.

Hobbies are not my thing

It's been my stock response for years to say that I just don't have any hobbies. I guess it's more accurate to say that I don't have any traditional hobbies. I don't make anything, I don't collect anything, and I don't feel obsessive about any one thing. What I've learned from so many of you lately is that I probably need to change my definition of hobby. These are lots of things that I am interested in, and lots of things that I enjoy. And to tell the truth, I do make a few things, but they tend to get eaten. I decided to consult a few other people about this since I'm obviously not very objective about my own hobbies.

My main interest, and time suck, is reading. I read, a lot. Book, magazines, blogs, e-mail, on-line news. I have even been known to read nutrition information or medication directions when really desperate. I was always the kid who tried to get her mom give her five more minuted before lights out. I just never wanted to put my books down. I still don't. And if I don't read, I get cranky, so I know it's an important part of my life. My current novel reading tends toward the Young Adult genre, though I certainly don't limit myself. I went through my romance novel phase between say 11 and 14, I went through an Anne Rice phase that lasted for ages, though I still can't bring myself to read Christ the Lord. I went through a sci-fi phase that started with Star Wars and went from there. The one thing I don't do is force myself to finish every book that I start. For years I felt guilty if I didn't finish, but that fell by the wayside ages ago. Life is way too short to waste on something that I'm not enjoying.

I read anytime and anywhere. I read in front of the tv, I read standing in lines, and I read when I should be doing other things. Before my palm pilot died I never had to worry about not having a book with me. I kept Little Women and Pride and Prejudice on it for emergencies. Now I have to carry books with me, but I always do. There is never a time that is not good for reading.

I completely forgot that healthy eating and losing weight are a pretty big part of my life and have been for about a year and a half. It's so much a part of who I am these days that I forget about it. I've lost about half of my weight so far, and am still going strong. The cooking had spring out of this. I have always liked to cook, but until recently I didn't do it very often. Now I cook almost every day and I love to try new recipes and find things that are healthy and taste good. It's like a game, and I love it. But since the products get eaten, I have nothing to show for it.

I have interests and I dabble in lots of things. I cook, I watch a ton of movies (many over and over again) and lots of tv, and I'm pretty obsessive about college football. But would I call these things hobbies? Probably not. Are they hobbies? The jury's still out.

And one more introduction

It looks like I'm going to be representing everyone west of the Mississippi, and I'm totally ok with that. I'm Liz, 31, a librarian by training, though I haven't worked in a library since I was in school. At the moment I'm searching for that perfect position that will allow me to be a both a librarian and a tech geek. I live in the Los Angeles area and am a California girl born and bred. I've lived all over the West Coast, with a stop in Hawaii, and one in New Jersey along the way, but southern California is home.

I love all that LA has to offer: the atmosphere, the culture, and the people. It's fantastic that I can get great fish tacos in the afternoon and then have Vietnamese pho or cold soba noodles and tempura for dinner. I'm not involved in "the industry" but I do take advantage of advance movie screenings. I try to get to the theatre every so often and I spent this past weekend at the LA Times Festival of Books. And if I can't find anything else to do, I can walk just over a mile to the beach. :)

I love to read, mostly fiction, though I've been known to get sucked into a good memoir or collection of humorous autobiographical essays (a la David Sedaris). I've been reading a lot of young adult fiction lately. This is a fantastic genre and I wish it existed when I was younger. The kids now have so many great books to choose from, and I don't think they are just for kids.

I am also a sc-fi fanatic. I read the books I watch the movies, and Star Trek: The Next Generation just might be my all time favorite Tv show. Speaking of tv, I watch a lot of it. Reality shows, dramas, cartoons, cooking shows, and even a few comedies. And then there is my movies. I have 5 Netflix queues that are almost always maxed out. Though I do have my comfort movies that I watch over and over again. I also love to go see movies in the theater and love that independent and foreign films play near me.

I'm a rabid college football fan, and spend my Saturdays during the season game surfing and shouting at the tv. I go to a few games a year to support my USC Trojans, and am always sad in the off season.

I'm still struggling with the idea of who I am and where I'm headed. At some point I'd like to be a wife (or equivalent) and a mother, but for now I'm working on me. The outside is finally starting to match the inside and I'm finally starting to feel confident and happy again.

I hate starting sentences with I, but I don't know how to write about myself any other way. I'll have to work on that.